Honoring Our Loved Ones: A Lesson in Connection

In our close personal relationships—whether with a significant other, a parent, or a child—there are times when it feels like we’re not clicking. These moments of disconnect can be frustrating, leaving us feeling unheard and misunderstood. I’ve learned, albeit imperfectly, a valuable lesson about navigating these challenging times: the importance of understanding and honoring what matters to our loved ones.

One of the most impactful insights I gained in a recent program focused on communication and relationships was this: if you truly love someone, you should strive to give them what they want. This concept doesn’t refer to indulgence in every whim—such as giving a child a cookie during a tantrum—but rather to recognizing their passions and needs on a deeper level.

When we face communication hurdles, it’s easy to fall into the trap of “I” language, expressing our own frustrations and feelings without considering the other person's perspective. However, if we shift our focus and ask ourselves what our loved ones genuinely desire or need, we can create a bridge toward a more fulfilling connection.

For instance, think about the last time you felt disconnected from someone important in your life. Instead of continuing to express your own feelings of frustration, take a step back and consider what they are passionate about. What brings them joy? What challenges are they facing? Finding these answers allows us to meet them where they are emotionally and relationally.

If we declare that someone is the most important person in our lives, it’s only fitting that we honor that status through our actions. This means being present, listening actively, and showing that we value their interests and emotions. It’s about making a conscious effort to nurture the relationship by giving support, encouragement, and love in ways that resonate with them.

While I may not have perfected this approach, I am committed to practicing it. I believe that when we choose to focus on what matters to our loved ones, we foster deeper connections. Let’s strive to honor those important relationships by learning to give what truly matters to the people we love. After all, isn’t that what genuine love is all about?